The Charlie Bravo Story

Butt squeezin’

What is UP with that place?

And what place would that be, Ajax? Ohhhh… you mean (cue scary music) THE VET!!!

You ain’t never lied! Dad said something about making my butthole faster, or I wouldn’t have agreed to go in the first place!

Hold on there, Jax; how were you supposed to make your butt faster?

I heard Dad tell Mom that he was going to have my anal glands expressed, so what was I supposed to think?

So, what happened?

Well, I don’t really want to talk about it, but you need to know; we pulled up to this place and DAD DESERTED ME! This lady came out and snatched me away and into this shop of horrors where not only did they poke and prod me but… well, I don’t want to say it out loud, so I’ll whisper it: they milked my butt.

Ohhh, wait a minute; was the lady’s name Dr Shaw?

Why, I think it was; how did you know that?

Because she has an illness when it comes to a dog’s behindular regions; she’s always easing around behind me like she’s trying to make some sort of poopsicle. But you have to admit, that jar of treats she keeps on the counter was pretty sparky, wasn’t it?

(Dad) what are you two goobers whispering about back there? Did I hear Dr Shaw mentioned?

I was just telling Charlie how I was violated; after what I suffered, I should at least get flowers and candy out of the deal!

All righty then, I understand; I don’t enjoy the encounters with my own personal Dr Jellyfinger. But some things are necessary, and Dr Andrea Shaw IS the vet that helped pull Charlie back from the edge, as well as countless others, so she must be doing something right. Right?

Well, you can say all you want, but the next time I go in there, I’m going to be sporting a cork; maybe that’ll slow her down a bit… I’m taking a nap; maybe I’ll awake to find this was just a horrible dream.

Dad here; although it took a time of intensive therapy(a trip by the Sonic to grab some Cinnasnacks), it looks like Ajax is going to survive his ordeal. Dr Shaw even did a little manscaping on the boy, creating a “poop trail” (her words, not mine) to thwart the development of dingleberries.

And Charlie also came through her own exam with flying colors; 65# of velvety muscle, no heartworms or other parasites, and ready for the next adventure.

(Charlie) yeah, yeah, yeah; but she still had that dang stick…

Happy Charlie Bravo Day!

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