…for a good night’s rest, one not marred with jarring thoughts of doom and despair or buzzing, nerve-jangling phone calls in the wee hours of the morning. Thank you for self-entitled dogs that obviously have no concept of fractions and right angles but somehow realize that diagonal and even horizontal are the ways to occupy the most real estate. Thank you for sleeping arrangements obviously engineered to help me overcome any claustrophobia concerns, the equivalent of slumbering in an MRI machine constructed of snoring, farting, dogflesh. Thank you for providing me with an organic alarm clock who’s saliva output is sufficient to ensure that searching for the snooze button is out of the question. Thank you for a wife who is understanding enough to realize that resistance is futile and it’s best to just adapt and improvise, and that sleeping with her head at the foot of the bed might be considered by some as a form of canine Feng shui.
But most of all, thank you for a bunch of fellow misfits who understand my blessings completely, a family that stretches around the globe, brought together by the stories of a once sad but now sassy diva dog.
And then they all said…