It was brought to my attention that, due to the addition of Claire Bear and Titus Pullo, I needed to update this song... so here ya go: And a one and a two... Well I don't know why I try to lay here at night, I get the feeling that the floor I'll soon bite I'm so scared I haven't slept in two weeks Clutching the mattress edge between my butt cheeks Charlie's to the…

Female operator: 911, what's your emergency? Titus: uh, is there anybody else there I can talk to? Like a guy, maybe? Operator: I can assist you; what seems to be the problem, sir? Titus: well, I need to report a robbery of some very personal articles; mom took me in the van, then I got real sleepy. It was when I woke up and began to perform me morning ablutions that I discovered "them" missing!…

Spent the day at church, kind of; actually in a sinister-looking white panel van with Alex. We were loaded down with a passel of yapping goofballs heading north to St Louis and beyond to their forever homes, collected from various rescue groups along the way. (First scriptural reference coming up) "Forsake not the assembling of yourselves together" The prelude to the actual services began when we left Little Rock well before daylight, and started with…

Titus Pullo here; I am filing my first report from the Casa del Whackos. Mom got the story half right, I AM a redneck dog, born and raised in a trailer park in southwest Little Rock, a true "09er", meaning from the zip code 72209. This area has been infamous for years as the home of rattle-canned pick-up trucks blaring "Freebird" from rattle-y Radio Shack cassette players, but recently been repopulated with the influx of…

Dad here; I know that many of you have been expecting a Titus background story, but I don't think you realize how this works; I was waiting on him to tell ME, and he wasn't talking. With a "CHARK" like Charlie's roaring constantly my ears, it takes a definitive voice that is so different from her's, like a Bull Taco or Max, to cut through the cacophony, and the voice of Titus was sounding suspiciously…

Idaho is a loooong state; we started south approximately twenty miles south of the Canadian border with no particular destination in mind but "down". But there is no down in Idaho, just back and forth, bouncing like a pinball between Washington and Montana as we made our way down to the Lolo Highway, the famous site of the motorcyclist's favorite road sign,"curvy road next 99 miles". Idaho is a meteorological phenomena, as the farther south…

This one goes out to the ones I love; this one goes out to the ones I left behind... Sleep apnea is a condition where your air intake is constricted when you sleep, and as a result, your organs, your lungs, brain, kidneys, but most importantly, your heart, never truly rest as your body fights for the oxygen that it needs to repair itself as you rest. Except you never really rest, and the downward…